Worthy

 I’ve been going through some faith changes of late. Perhaps some people will be disheartened about them and worry about the path I’m on but for me I’ve never been so sure of the Love of God. I’m letting go of some things I’ve been taught because I don’t see them in the life of Jesus. I’m not going to dive deep into the changes I’ve had but in this blog post I’ll share a few. In Christianity it’s taught how we are wretched sinners. Depending on what flavour of Christianity one subscribes to this can be subtle or bashed over your head repeatedly. But subtle or not this is a prominent teaching. Brad Jersak (I think it was him), refers to this as piece of shit theology. Jesus summed up the commandments in Matthew 22:37-39: Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbour as yourself.’ 

How can we effectively love our neighbour as ourselves if we are told again and again that at the core of our being we are worthless? Can we really love ourselves well if this is what we are taught again and again?  It’s questions like these that I’ve had that have made me rethink these things. And yet upon completing His creation He looked on all He had made and called it good. Is sin more powerful than that original declaration? I don’t see it. We are made in the very image of God. He breathed life into us. Here is a collage I made about our worth and a song that I find very fitting. The song is called Tension and Thrill by Sleeping at Last. My song links aren’t showing up on all devices. 

I also can’t believe this notion that God can’t be in the presence of sin anymore. After Adam and Eve sinned they saw their nakedness. They tried to cover themselves up and they tried to hide. Yet God came LOOKING for them. He didn’t turn His face from their presence. The verse to uphold this teaching of God not being able to look on sin is found in Habakkuk 1:13 and for some reason is usually only shared partly. The full verse reads: Your eyes are too pure to look upon evil and You cannot tolerate wrongdoing.

So why do You tolerate the faithless? Also Jesus is God in the flesh. And who did he hang out with? The tax collectors. The drunkards. The prostitutes. The marginalized. This notion of God not being able to be in the presence of sin I can no longer believe that. So from all this one might ask well why did He die then if not to pay for our sins. I have many thoughts on that but I’ll save it for another time. In brief I believe His death on the cross wasn’t to appease God’s wrath but rather to reveal His love and forgiveness. ‘Father forgive them for they know not what they do’ Luke 23:34. I’ve got two songs to share, both go with this collage I made. I titled it Timshel, which essentially means the ability to rule over sin, Genesis 4:7.

Listen to Timshel here:

 I also find this lyric from the song titled 'Bad Blood'  by Sleeping at Last very relevant to my collage and what I've shared in this post:

We study our story arcs, inherently good, or were we broken right from the start. My answer: Inherently good. You may have a different answer and that's ok. We are all on this journey called life and I'm ok with not arriving at the same conclusions as everyone else. I just hope I can also have the same grace extended to me. Let's hold space for one another and love one another. 

* I've been having some issues with the songs I share not showing up when using mobile. If this happens and you are inclined to listen (please do!) they can all be found on youtube, or most streaming services, they are as follows: Tension and Thrill, by Sleeping at Last. This goes along with the first collage I shared. Then for the last collage: Timshel, by Mumford and Sons and Bad Blood by Sleeping at Last. 

 

Love is an Echo

 My favourite worship song right now is instrumental. How does that work, you might ask? Well in all honesty it technically has words, about the middle of the song, which is called Hearing, very faintly the words, Love is an Echo are sung. Song writer, Ryan O'Neal describes the beautiful story of this song, it's well worth the read. I'll post the link at the end. 

So aside from where the artist is coming from with this song I will write about my own experience because it's all I can write about. Normally what draws me to a song are the lyrics. But this song is so powerful for me both musically and lyrically. See, for me this song works as a perfect metaphor of God's love. 

A friend recently asked what does God's love feel like? I responded: God's love is a beautiful symphony, a keeping in time, as we dance to loves melody, the crescendo brings shivers to my soul.  I feel exactly that when I listen to Hearing. The music for me is like His perfect love for me reflected in every note. Every build up. Every stroke of the violin, Shouts, I love you...I love my creation...His love echos out to us throughout all creation. 

Here's the song, listen with headphones if you can and as you do listen for the echo of God saying, I love you. 

https://youtu.be/SCYe0GC2M94

And here is Ryan's blog about the song. 

http://www.sleepingatlast.com/blog/hearing-how-it-was-made

Strength in Pain

I'll find strength in pain

And I will change my ways

I'll know my name as it's called again....

-The Cave, Mumford and Sons

We've all heard it before...you find out how strong you are through the battles of life...or in Christian circles, how we rely fully on God and that it's His strength that gets us through, something that, looking back on my life I fully believe. 

It's easy though in amongst the struggles of life to become a victim of them...sometimes we let the things we go through define us...there's such power to me in that last line of the lyric: I'll know my name as it's called again...the thing is, we aren't defined by our circumstances. We are defined by the Father's love, defined as beloved, chosen. So we sometimes do have to change our ways, align our thinking with His and listen to His still small voice that calls us to Him saying rest in me, I love you. 

Even a Passing Prayer

This morning I was on a walk, and I found myself just talking with God, mostly just thanking Him for the nature around me and good friends, that kind of thing. My mind was going all over the place and I just thought in passing how I hadn't gotten any God revelations in a song for some time. I found myself not even consciously praying but saying something more like: God, I'd really love for you to reveal something in a song to me again. 

So fifteen minutes later I'm driving home and this song Broken Crown comes on. Disclaimer, there is swearing. I've been chewing on this song for probably two years at least. I've had some thoughts but nothing cohesive but a thought here and there and nothing I could tell my full thoughts on. So just after this passing thought prayer as I'm listening all of a sudden all the scattered thoughts I've had about this song came together. There's a lesson in that. Some might say it's silly to ask God to speak to you through a song. But the thing is, I love music. And I serve a God who loves me and who delights in me and who gives good gifts. Because He knows music means a lot to me, He continues to meet me there. And it didn't take a proper religious prayer. I just talked to Him, like I would any of my earthly friends and said something in passing and like any good friend that cares, He went out of His way to do something He knew would bring me joy.  

So here's the interpretation of the song...two years in the making, brought by a God that hears even the passing prayer. 

Touch my mouth
And hold my tongue
I'll never be your chosen one
I'll be home, safely tucked away
Well you can't tempt me if I don't see the day

MY THOUGHTS:  'Trying to resist temptation'

The pull on my flesh was just too strong

It stifled the choice and the air in my lungs
Better not to breathe than to breathe a lie
'Cause when I open my body, I breathe a lie

MY THOUGHTS: 'Giving into temptation' 

I will not speak of your sin
There was a way out for him
The mirror shows not
Your values are all shot

MY THOUGHTS: 'There's a way out but he can't see it. He feels all the values he held up to this point are shot because of his sin.'

But oh, my heart was flawed
I knew my weakness
So hold my hand
Consign me not to darkness

MY THOUGHTS: 'Here he's admitting he knew he was weak and asking to not be given up on. I hear a cry for grace and not just saying, oh well, he's sinned I'll leave you to your sin, there's no hope for you. 

So crawl on my belly 'til the sun goes down
I'll never wear your broken crown
I took the road and I fucked it all the way
Now in this twilight, how dare you speak of grace

MY THOUGHTS: 'So true grace wasn't extended. The person washed their hands of them so to speak earlier on and then comes and tries to extend grace. I see this as: I won't walk with you through this issue. I won't meet you where you are, I won't invest in you but I'll TELL you about grace, but it's just words I won't walk in grace WITH you. 

So crawl on my belly 'til the sun goes down
I'll never wear your broken crown
I can take the road and I can fuck it all the way
But in this twilight, our choices seal our fate

MY THOUGHTS: 'Now they have to both deal with the choices they've made'.

TAKE AWAY:

God is a God of Grace, and therefore we should desire to be people of grace. Grace isn't coming in and saying you've done wrong, and saying grace be with you. Grace often is messy, it's walking with people through their crap. It's being a friend when it's maybe not easy to be. It's being a shoulder to cry on. It's walking alongside and being real with each other, but also loving each other. Saying, ya I know you've messed up, but I'm here. I love you, I'm here to listen, I'm here to try to help you figure this out. That's the kind of grace that the world needs. 

Your Love Endures

 

In the silver light

I just made out

Your silhouette

Through the quickening haze

So brand it on my mind 

So I don't forget

Let it shine

On my wandering eyes

And ooh, Your Love Endures

And ooh, I have faith for the rest

These lyrics are so beautiful to me. When you think of branding it's a pretty serious thing, pretty painful, pretty permanent. To me this is a deep prayer. Brand YOUR love on MY mind so I don't forget it...even when my eyes wander from you, let YOUR love shine and in Your love I can have faith for everything else. Your love gives me hope to have faith, to go on. 

Later the song goes on to say:

And in the valley I am free

But in the hills I soar

Valley's are often spoken as hard times in life...so when we have His love 'branded' on our minds (and on our hearts), His love lets us know that despite the circumstances we are in, we are free. This is our identity in Christ, our circumstances don't define us, His love does. 

So whether I am free in the valley or soaring in the hills I want His love branded on my mind and to live in the assurance that His Love endures no matter what. What a great place to live. 

I can't help but think of this scripture: For in Him we live and move and have our being. Acts 17:28. 

The Maker's Hand

 This is one of my favourite lyrics of all time: 

You can understand dependence when you know the Maker's Hand

....dependence? No one really speaks about dependence. It's pretty much a dirty word now isn't it? But when you come to a place of understanding God, of realizing your need for Him to walk alongside you, not in a demanding, domineering way but gently guiding you along like a loving Father and  begin to understand His love and His gentleness you come to a place where doing life on your own is so unappealing.

Being dependent is frowned upon in todays society, but the thing is aren't we all dependent to a degree? Dependent on our success in our career, being the perfect Pinterest mother, dependent on coffee to get us through the day and dependent on wine to end a tough day. We all have things or people we are dependent on. I'll gladly depend on the One who established the world by His Wisdom, ( Jeremiah 51:15). The One who delights in me, (Psalm 18:19). Who rejoices over me with singing, (Zephaniah 3:17). 

Ever loving, ever kind, my Jesus. 

His Love Stands Alone

Yesterday I was listening to Bear's Den...no surprise there, they've been getting a lot of airplay and have slowly become my favourite band other than Mumford and Sons. It was a slow love with these guys, I didn't even remotely like them till the third try, so the fact that they've raised to equal level with Mumford is a pretty big deal.  

So, moving on, I'm doing some cleaning in the kitchen yesterday and the song Love Can't Stand Alone comes on...which within the context of the song and whatever the writer is going through is probably true but I always like to listen through a God lens so the statement through that lens makes no sense. Anyhow, I'm listening and working and this lyric jumps out at me: 

I'll never leave you out in the cold....

and then clear as day I heard God speak to me in my spirit, here's what He said....


My child, I will never leave you or forsake you, 
there's no place you can go that My Love can't reach, 
I will never, EVER abandon you my beloved. 
MY LOVE and it alone will stand and endure forever. 

Wow! A message I can cling to,  and a message for you as well.